But God – Forgiveness
Yes, it’s a word we all love to hear. Amen? I can only imagine how many amens I get while people read this. I kid you not. It’s often something that can be difficult for a lot of us. Truth be told, we love to be forgiven when we are in the wrong, but we don’t always like to forgive when wronged. Ever heard of the phrase ‘hurting people hurt people’? This statement doesn’t portray forgiveness, rather, it screams payback.
This is really interesting when you think about it, right?
Most of us would like to treat others how we would like to be treated. So why is it so hard for us to forgive people sometimes? No other way saying this, it’s because we are sinful beings. We like to see people “get what they deserve.” As horrible as it sounds, when someone hurts us, we want them to experience pain too. We don’t want them to get off easy and not suffer any consequences, right? The truth is that we are no better than them! We are equally as sinful as those who sin against us. Ephesians 4:32, NIV says, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” When we are sinful and turn our backs against God, He always shows us grace. He forgives us and continues to love and pursue us.
The only thing that would be harder would be to forgive family, but not just a family: a brother who has sold you out to slavery and robbed you of your youth. And so in Genesis, as Joseph and his brothers come to a heartwarming meeting and reconciliation, we are left with the question: did Joseph forgive his brothers?
Many are familiar with the story of Joseph; the family drama, a multicolored tunic, and wild dreams. This story stands out among the stories in the Old Testament. But the story of Joseph is also a powerful testament of God’s providence. Though Joseph suffered injustice twice, firstly at the hands of his brothers and secondly with Potiphar’s wife, God used what men intended for evil to not only provide for him and his family, but for the nation of Egypt and the whole world. When Joseph’s jealous brothers sold him into slavery, little did he know that he would eventually become second in command in Egypt and provide relief for the nations during a worldwide famine. And as glorious as that might seem, a journey of forgiveness had to happen.
Later on in the story when Jacob died, Joseph’s brothers were afraid that Joseph would try to get revenge on them (remember hurting people hurt people), and that it was only their father who had been preventing him from lashing out. They told him that Jacob had asked him to forgive them and said that they would be his slaves. Joseph wept before them and assured them that they had his forgiveness:
But Joseph replied to them: “Do not fear. Can I take the place of God? Even though you meant harm to me, God meant it for good, to achieve this present end, the survival of many people. So now, do not fear. I will provide for you and for your children.” By speaking kindly to them, he reassured them (Genesis 50:19-21, NIV).
What a turnaround. A messy journey of betrayal and injustice to forgiveness.
Only GOD
So the challenge is to all of us, myself included, to practice exactly what Joseph did towards those who hurt and sinned against him. Because not forgiving and sitting in a place of bitterness is disobedience to the Lord. Forgiveness can be really hard and if we are honest really painful, but I promise you it will bring you more peace, joy, and love than withholding that forgiveness.
When someone hurts you, betrays you, makes you feel small, or gives you a kick from behind that leaves you winded you usually have one or two options. You can either find it in your heart to forgive them and pray for the Lord to deal with it, or you hold onto it and let it deal with you, creating bitterness inside you towards others. The second option may obviously be the easiest in that kind of situation. You may just want to shut down and sit in frustration and anger. I know I have done this far too many times. However, when I choose the second option, typically the only person that it truly hurts is me. I want so badly for that other person to know they hurt me, that I end up being the one that hurts more. Choosing the right thing isn’t always easy, but it challenges you and pushes you to be better. I do want to clarify that I’m not saying it’s always just as easy as the flip of a switch.
only God is able to bring a journey of injustice to a destination of forgiveness
Look at Joseph, a long journey to forgiveness but a journey he took not by himself but with the Lord. The pain you experience in these kinds of situations is not necessarily going to be easy to get over, and they definitely won’t always be easy to forget. Those painful moments are hard and hurt is a valid emotion that you feel. However, it’s what you do with that emotion that will determine the path from that moment on. You can either walk in forgiveness, freeing you and your heart from the situation and drawing you nearer to the Lord, or you can choose to let those feelings harvest inside you, causing you to experience more pain and bitterness and even allowing it to play into your relationships with other people.
Speaking from experience, when you hold on to unforgiveness your arms hurt. That’s it in a nutshell. You hurt too. Bitterness takes hold of you. Forgiveness is freedom.
Like I said earlier, forgiveness is hard, but it’s a lot harder if you’re trying to do it on your own. Thankfully, we have a Father to walk through these trials with us and we can be obedient in the forgiveness that He calls us to. Matthew 6:14-15, NIV says, “And when you pray, make sure you forgive the faults of others so that your Father in heaven will also forgive you. But if you withhold forgiveness from others, your Father withholds forgiveness from you.”
Withholding forgiveness doesn’t just hinder your relationship with that other person, it also hinders your relationship with God. Just like that verse says, He will also withhold forgiveness from you. On top of that, withholding forgiveness leaves room in your heart for more bitterness than love. Through forgiveness, you will find so much freedom, and I think you’ll find a lot more joy too. Earlier on I quoted ‘only God’, only God is able to bring a journey of injustice to a destination of forgiveness.
But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which He loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace, you have been saved— and raised us up with Him and seated us with Him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages He might show the immeasurable riches of His grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God -(Ephesians 2:4-8, NKJV)
So as you walk out forgiveness remember BUT GOD being rich in mercy.
Remember to surround yourself with people that will encourage you in the Lord. Community/Church is so important for things like this. Have someone you can share your feelings and your struggles with, and that will pour into you and walk through it with you. Find people that also want to grow in forgiveness and come together in prayer.
Love your neighbor as yourself. Mark 12:31, NIV says (talking about the greatest commandments) “The second is this: Love your neighbor as yourself” This is such a great reminder for us in situations when forgiveness is really difficult. Love others and love them well. It is what the Lord calls us to do. Joseph could have held a grudge against his brothers when they came to him for food, their lives were literally in his hands. However, he did not use the opportunity to take revenge on his brothers for all the suffering they had caused him; instead, he chose to forgive them and invited them to live in the land of Egypt.
Remember forgiveness is a choice and is easily extended when we remind ourselves of…BUT GOD
